I am the Baby’s Father !!!!!!!!!

So I was surfing the web the other day and I came across this post by  @blogzilla called Women Who Won’t Date Men With Kids Are The Scum Of The Earth and I read some things that were quiet disturbing. The mere fact some women won’t date a man who has a child is (in mike Tyson voice) “ludicrous”. What part of the game is that? I know there are some dead beat dads out there and if you are reading this and you are one, step your game up! But if you are a good father and you are looking to find that special someone, don’t worry! Hold your head high. There are some great women out there that will accept the fact that you have a child(ren). Now I wouldn’t go as far as to say that a woman who won’t date men with kids are the “scum of the earth”. (C’mon, son…that attitude might be a reason WHY you’re having a problem coming across as a ‘good guy’.)  I think that it’s all in the attitude and the approach you take.

Ladies listen up! I know you are tired of the lames and deadbeats out there, but there are plenty of men that are responsible parents. The fact that a woman says she won’t date a man with a child because of BM drama is a cop-out and an excuse. How are you going to pre-judge a man who has a child and say right off the bat that you won’t engage in a relationship with him? Hello ladies if you do find a man who treats his child or children right, you should take notice of that. You can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats his family & his kids.(I will give a pass to those guys who chose WRONG and got dat type of BM whose ultimate goal in life is to make him (his family and the court system) miserable…I won’t blame a woman for not getting involved in a homicide situation waiting to happen)

I want women to see how much we love our children and appreciate the fact that we handle our biz when it comes to their care. I would find it strange if she has been dealing with a low-life BD of her own. Only an immature female would assume a man is still fucking his Baby Mother. What type of shit is that? (Unless you still are! Sometimes a woman’s suspicion is justified. Fall back, son. Either you’re with your BM or you’re not. “Shit or get off the toilet”, is what my Father used to tell me about breaking up)

Me & my son’s mother (see what I said son’s mother not baby mama) are not together AND I’m not sleeping with her. We have a decent relationship and we co-parent because that’s our job above and beyond all else. All of these shows like Maury have totally warped peoples perception of what a good man or father is.  What decent woman wouldn’t want a man that takes care of their responsibilities?  There are plenty of woman who want that. Go to your local family court and you’ll see tons of woman who want a decent man to take care of their child/children.

Ladies wonder why they can’t find a good man, it’s because most women have known clue what a good man is? This hurts me, I mean it really does. I am single but I am dating and I have no problem with letting my potential mate know that I have a child. I’m proud of the fact that I have a beautiful son, and he is a good kid. Why? Because I’m there and make sure that he knows that Daddy always has his best interest at heart.

If the shoe was on the other foot….How would you feel if you met a dude and you feeling him and you tell him that you have a child/children and he turns and runs for the hills? You wouldn’t like it would you. Black men have so many barriers in life that prevent them from being productive citizens, and this issues only adds to the list of things that Black men have to deal with. I thought your woman was supposed to help, love, nurture, and hold down her man. So how is this holding us down? I hate to say this (my beautiful Black & Latin woman I love ya’ll) but you  got to wonder why Tiger Woods deals with white woman? It may be because when shit gets tough they ride it out.  I know a couple of interracial couples that have kids and where the male is black and had a kid from a previous relationship and THEY have a healthy loving combined family.

I see a problem if we can’t learn to do the same. We need to put our families back together not continue to pick each other apart. It takes a village to raise a child, are you willing to be a tribe member or not?

Until Next Time,

P.S To all of my fans that have follow me here, Twitter, and have graced my page with your great feedback & comments. I want to take the time to thank you, and wish you a Happy Holiday Season and a Safe & Prosperous New Year!!!

I have some great things in store for 2010, and I’m glad you are along for the ride....


Young M. Clayton



  1. #comeson You think Tiger dates white women because they are riders. If he didnt have ca$h they wouldnt bother with him. He likes them because he wants to be them. He wants nothing to do with the black culture. So how can you justify his his love for white women, by pointing out a flaw with black women. The women you are talking about today are scally wags. If they dont want men with kids its thier lost, but to attempt to justify his bull shyt is ri-damn-dic-ulous.

    • Damn Toya.. I think you missed what I said…… I don’t agree with him….. I said

    • Toya I love you but I think you missed what I said… I didn’t say I agreed what what he did I nor am I justifying him doing what he did… that wasn’t what the post was about…. it was about how woman view me with kids….

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  3. I think each person has a right to choose whether or not they want to date someone with kids. Personally, as a single mother, I would prefer a person be honest first with themselves, then with me about whether the fact that I have a 17-year-old son bothers them. I don’t want anyone in my life that has a problem with me having a kid.

    On the flip side, as I’m getting closer to being done with my single mother journey and closer to my empty nester journey, I thinking that I might not want to date a man with younger children for couple of reasons:

    (1) I’m done with that stage in my life and I would like to date with having to schedule it around kids’ activities, school engagements and what-nots. Been there done that.

    (2) It would be great to date someone with kids in the same age range for obvious reasons like we could share our experiences, etc.

    Still, I think everyone should respect each other’s right to date whomever they choose.

    You be mad at someone because they don’t like kids – or your kids – and are woman or man enough to say. Actually, you should thank them. You should be concerned about the ones that lie to you and treat your kids like crap in the end!

    • I never said I was mad…. SMH…. I just commented on a post that was written by blogxilla… at the end of the day I don’t have a problem finding someone who will accept me with my son, I just have a problem with some of the poor excuses some females use to discredit good men that have children, and are looking to find someone that is willing to accept him & his child. I think it is rather funny how some woman have internalized this post and not listened to the message which is quite clear. *Don’t Judge a Book by it’s Cover*

  4. I guess I lost focus when I read this ********I hate to say this (my beautiful Black & Latin woman I love ya’ll) but you got to wonder why Tiger Woods deals with white woman? It may be because when shit gets tough they ride it out. ********

    But my answer remains the same to the question that you got to wonder why he deals with white woman, and its because he wants nothing to do the black culture, women, or anything else.

    But I feel you on everything else.

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  6. it may be because they believe u (us men) still smash the child’s mother, u know .

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